I was diagnosed with TB about 3 months back. It was scary at that time, I was constantly worried about the 3 lumps on the right side of my neck. Doctors scared me with multiple possibilities of it being all kinds of diseases. I woke up some days thinking if I have lived a full enough life :P. (Happily enough, the answer was yes.)
I was so upset some days, that I called up my friends and family and just chatted. He was also concerned, to say the least. Then, I took a 10-day off from work and went home. Spent a blissful week and a half in Baroda. I went with him to see his new life. We travelled through the old city areas and while he sourced for his sports lounge. We went to this really shady place from where he got his Red Bulls. That place also had a lot of fake personal care products - my new world. We were very curious about what we had grown into, in the 8 months that we spent away from each other. I could make out that he thought I was pretty sharp to point out fake-imitations of Garnier and L'Oreal products and I thought he was pretty cool to have digressed distributors and found himself a douche of a supplier who got him lower than market prices. We were happy to have had a glimpse of the new worlds we know nothing about. That day was perfect, because it ended in an auditorium with peals of laughter around the city's latest band of entertainers regaling us with stand-up comedy. Some days are meant to be treasured and this certainly had that dreamy quality, right down to cloudy skies, a balmy breeze, a starry night and lovely shared glances at jokes we found funny.
At the end of that day, I decided I was quite dumb to let him go fully. He was a FRIEND first and everything else next. So I Whatsapped him and I Facebook-Messaged the Light-of-His-Life that I have made peace with all that was the past. I guess it was all those silly impressions about dying within a couple of years that made me do all this, haha. Ten days down the line, I realized I didn't mean any of it! :D I still get a kick out of baiting him - I know exactly what to say! And, I most certainly still think of her as a bitch, especially when I think of all the crap that she and her friends dared to write on my blog :P
So, anyway, moving on, I have TB. I pop a lot of meds in a day. Sometimes, I feel nauseated, but more often than not, I am pretty much okay *touch wood*, but it is hilarious how I equate everything to the meds. My skin is too oily, so Google search: anti-tuberculosis treatment oily skin. I am becoming fat. Tuberculosis treatment weight gain. I have a slight shoulder ache. Tuberculosis treatment body ache. I feel tired at the end of the day. Tuberculosis treatment tiredness.
On the other hand, I know some of the side effects of the TB meds. So, there's that too. Am I going blind? Is my head aching because I can't see anymore? Is my liver swelling (yeah, like I can tell!) Are there rashes on my neck?
I guess I shouldn't laugh at a malady I haven't been cured of yet. It takes a year to be completely okay. But, I think I will always look back at this with a sense of whimsical amusement. What all life throws at us! What all thoughts I have had! :D
I was so upset some days, that I called up my friends and family and just chatted. He was also concerned, to say the least. Then, I took a 10-day off from work and went home. Spent a blissful week and a half in Baroda. I went with him to see his new life. We travelled through the old city areas and while he sourced for his sports lounge. We went to this really shady place from where he got his Red Bulls. That place also had a lot of fake personal care products - my new world. We were very curious about what we had grown into, in the 8 months that we spent away from each other. I could make out that he thought I was pretty sharp to point out fake-imitations of Garnier and L'Oreal products and I thought he was pretty cool to have digressed distributors and found himself a douche of a supplier who got him lower than market prices. We were happy to have had a glimpse of the new worlds we know nothing about. That day was perfect, because it ended in an auditorium with peals of laughter around the city's latest band of entertainers regaling us with stand-up comedy. Some days are meant to be treasured and this certainly had that dreamy quality, right down to cloudy skies, a balmy breeze, a starry night and lovely shared glances at jokes we found funny.
At the end of that day, I decided I was quite dumb to let him go fully. He was a FRIEND first and everything else next. So I Whatsapped him and I Facebook-Messaged the Light-of-His-Life that I have made peace with all that was the past. I guess it was all those silly impressions about dying within a couple of years that made me do all this, haha. Ten days down the line, I realized I didn't mean any of it! :D I still get a kick out of baiting him - I know exactly what to say! And, I most certainly still think of her as a bitch, especially when I think of all the crap that she and her friends dared to write on my blog :P
So, anyway, moving on, I have TB. I pop a lot of meds in a day. Sometimes, I feel nauseated, but more often than not, I am pretty much okay *touch wood*, but it is hilarious how I equate everything to the meds. My skin is too oily, so Google search: anti-tuberculosis treatment oily skin. I am becoming fat. Tuberculosis treatment weight gain. I have a slight shoulder ache. Tuberculosis treatment body ache. I feel tired at the end of the day. Tuberculosis treatment tiredness.
On the other hand, I know some of the side effects of the TB meds. So, there's that too. Am I going blind? Is my head aching because I can't see anymore? Is my liver swelling (yeah, like I can tell!) Are there rashes on my neck?
I guess I shouldn't laugh at a malady I haven't been cured of yet. It takes a year to be completely okay. But, I think I will always look back at this with a sense of whimsical amusement. What all life throws at us! What all thoughts I have had! :D
During half of the post I was wondering whether I have come to the right blog. And it came -
ReplyDelete"Ten days down the line, I realized I didn't mean any of it! :D"
Hahaa. It is has to be this way only.
Quoting this:
"What you feel doesn't matter in the end; it's what you do that makes you brave" - Andre Agassi.
It's should not really matter to you how they feel or even you feel. I have learnt that in life somehow is more about doing then feeling.
The quote may be little misfit here. But customize it.
But I am sure you will come out of TB soon. Once, my doctor took some tests for TB and at that time I was happy that I got some matter for my blog.
And As we discussed once, sometimes success lies in letting go.
Luck and Health.
Vinay!! :) Such nice things you say!! :D And,no, not at all, the quote is certainly not a misfit. In fact, it fits perfectly. I take it to mean that no matter what this idiot guy feels, he is ready to do nothing when it comes to me. He is eventually going to NOT land up with me. And, after all this time, I don't quite want to be with him. Now, I just like to rile him. So, yes. The letting go part of it has begun in earnest. Finally. :P
ReplyDelete